Letting go is not about throwing everything away, cutting off toxic relationships, and chopping off all your hair. Granted, each of these things may happen as you shed the old you and welcome in a new phase. But there’s more going on underneath the surface...
Every day I encourage people to feel free. Donate this, toss that. The look reflected back at me is always the same, as if I’m speaking a different language. I then go into the many reasons why they don’t need all this stuff. Sometimes I’m successful, sometimes I might as well be talking to a wall. Either way, when I leave they feel better, less stressed, less overwhelmed, and more relaxed, but I don’t. I may get rid of possessions daily, but I don’t feel free.
I feel pressure and expectations to get things done, make goals happen, bring happiness to those I love, and to wake-up and impress myself. I’ve shed a lot of material things, but I still feel constrained. Starting my business granted me freedom of time (the very thing I thought I needed to live fully). But then there were people telling me how to run a business, how to be a mother, how to love, how to be loved, and ultimately how to live. I never realized how much I haven’t chosen solely on my own. Being the self-driven and out-spoken individual, I am, this came as a shock. How much of a roll have others played on my life and the decisions I’ve made? How much of it is me and how much of it is the box I created around me?
As I get older, each day I take interest in things I would have never given a second thought before. Someone like me doesn’t do those things, wear, listen or buy those things. I’d like to believe I’m adventurous and open but it’s as long as it fits within the parameters of who I expect to be, who my parents raised me to be, who my friends are, and who society says I am.
"Minimalism is the intentional promotion of the things we most value and the removal of anything that distracts us from it." -Joshua Becker
Your values are not only reflected in material possessions, but choices and commitments as well. Here I am thinking it’s the things holding people back (myself included) but it’s the choices tied to them that's creating the damage.
With only weeks away from my 28th birthday, I feel the strongest urge to reevaluate the life I’ve created. The choices I’ve made have gotten me here, yet some are keeping me here as well. Every day of September I’ll be letting go of choices, commitments, and of course things til September 19th. Feel free to join in for your own declutter voyage or watch the journey unfold. What better way to freedom than granting yourself a blank slate.
Being a mom, especially a new one, we’re always looking for ways to capture these fleeting occurrences. Before they arrive we are capturing their essence with 3D photos and maternity shoots. We preserve their first outfit from the hospital and every outfit after that, scrapbook every new milestone, and have become mamarazzis for our little ones.
It’s funny how much we resist the very things we want. We want to get up early and be more productive, but hit snooze every time. We want peace and happiness but over complicate our lives and over commit ourselves to things we don’t enjoy. We want to meet new, interesting people but hesitate having conversations with those who aren’t like us.
It’s the day after Christmas, and I’m running to the mall. Not to buy anything, God no. I’m not a fan of nationwide sales. Especially the kind that tricks you into believing you’re saving so much money it’s necessary to abandon quality time with friends, family or even yourself, to buy more stuff you won’t use or wear. I was returning some gifts that were well-intended but not quite right for me. I was confident hardly anyone would be at the mall. It was raining, gloomy, and it was the day after Christmas after all.