Where are all the Things You Should Have by Now?

A year ago I didn't expect to love motherhood this much
A year ago I didn't expect to love motherhood this much

How many of you thought you would have a corner office overlooking the city with great big windows by the age of 30? How many were under the impression that a few years after college there would be a big desk with your name on it, a plush leather chair where  you took calls, cancelled calls, and made enough money for a new car, a home of your own, and plenty of spending cash for trips and clothes?

Sidenote: I honestly don't know who gets big beautiful offices because my manager's manager works in the same tiny office I occasionally pump my breastmilk in. There's no windows, no gold-plated nametag, no big desk, and the chair has to be from Office Max 10 years ago. FACT.

I always envisioned I would've traveled more places by now. I would've definitely had the walk-in closet of my dreams by now. I would  absolutely own a nice modern condo downtown by now. Most importantly, I would be running my own business by now.

The place you thought you would be "by now" doesn't exist.

That place was put there to excite you. It was put there to show you what's in store if you better yourself,  build your talents, and work hard.

But there's no time stamp on when you will have all that you've ever wanted. And there's no guarantee it will look like what  you've imagined.

You must let go of the fantasy double-life you're simultaneously living in your head and check-in to what's real. See all you have done to get here and all you are doing to maintain. What does that look like?

Is it what you imagined? Is it what you hoped for?

I didn't imagine myself with a child until 29...maybe 30. I didn't imagine working for a telecom company because I've never been tech savvy (until now apparently). I never imagined myself skipping out on grad school to pursue a career in coaching.

I never imagined myself here and now that I am, it's not what I thought it would be. The things I hoped for didn't come in the package I expected, but it came.

I'm pursuing a career that is aligned with who I am but I'm doing it as I work at a job I can't stand. The rest of my 20's will be filled with adventures by the side of, not one, but the two loves of my life.

There are still many things that I long for, but I see now that I can have it in many different forms.

Our imagination creates all of our possibilities. We need our imagination to drive us. But don't let the power of your imagination keep you from embracing the things you want just because it's delivered in a different box. What you imagine you can create, you can be, you can have. But sitting in your imagination and refusing to exam your current reality because it's not what you thought it should be is suicidal for your heart's desires.

Everyday it is easy to envision the future, but looking at your life for what it is brings up all the things it's not, as well as what it has become. It allows you to see the things you've done and all the things you have yet to do. You see all the choices that have brought you this far. With a close look, not with your mind but with your heart, you may realize you have exactly what you long for.

This your reality check.

Feel free, Mel